Thursday, March 04, 2010

Only the Good Friday - Even in Bad Times

This has been a particularly tough week for me emotionally. My birthday is next week, and I find myself not exactly thrilled about it. It is not about the 'getting older' thing, but birthdays have a way of making you take note of where you are in life, the people around you, etc. etc.

So, anyway, without getting into all of it, because this is, after all, ONLY THE GOOD Friday, I've had a tough week.

And yet, even through it all, I have had these amazing glimmers of the amazing, wonderful, fantastic life I have.

THIS is my good today then.

My GOOD is that when my heart was breaking on Monday, and I was crying on the phone to my mother about how alone I felt in the world, she was there for me to talk to. My mom is amazing and my very best friend, and I love her.

My GOOD is that while I was moping about my woes, there were friends, specifically some Twitter friends, and a few others, who made me feel loved, and special, and not so alone in the world.

My GOOD is that when I took a step back from thinking about ME and had an honest, heartfelt conversation with God, HE made it clear to me that I need not worry.

My GOOD is that in the midst of this funk of mine, little hilarious things happened to make me laugh myself to tears, the sort of laughter we don't always get to experience.

My GOOD is that when I stopped long enough to realize that I don't need to sink into this depression, things really didn't look so bleak after all.

My GOOD is that yesterday I received the most unexpected and ridiculously indulgent surprise, which will make me a giddy 13 year old girl for weeks to come.

My GOOD is that I am alive, I am blessed, and I am NOT alone, even when I might think I am.

I'm still not completely out of my funk. I'm still not completely over the hurt. I'm still not completely over the feeling of neglect, abandonment, loneliness.

And yet...

In my heart, where it really matters, I know better.

Please go and visit Shelly and let her know what's GOOD in your Friday.


This Eclectic Life said...

Well, girl! I'm sorry that you are visiting the funky mood (I get that around MY birthday, too - tomorrow!).
I don't know what went on in your life to make you sad, but you DO have friends, and we love you. Even those of us who haven't MET you!
Happy birthday to you, and I hope you get out of that mood! Have a lovely weekend. Hugs!

Rose said...

Thank you Sonia, love you.