To all the boys I've loved before - The Intro

I've been promising stories of my past romantic escapades for a little while now, and I thought, what better time to share some of these tales than during the month of November, when I've got to come up with a new post everyday? So, as I consider whether or not I will start dating again, after a long break from that world, I can’t help but reflect on past relationships and experiences. Although I haven’t dated in quite a while, and feel completely out of touch with whatever dating is supposed to be nowadays, I have to admit that when I was younger, I dated a lot. I have stories and memories to fill books. At one point in my life not only did I have “it”, but I was overflowing with the confidence of how much of “it” I had. Getting a man’s attention, turning heads, collecting telephone numbers, and even having men profess their undying devotion to me, was something that just came sort of easily to me. Man, I had IT. I don’t know that I ever realized how good I had it, until now, when I most certainly no longer even have an idea of what “IT” is. Austin Powers called it his mojo, but whatever you want to call it, I want “it” back.

Now, before I go any further, I feel I should follow the above statement with a disclaimer or two. First of all, I was never cocky about “it”, I just had fun, never realizing how easy it was for me. Secondly, I flirted, dated, and experienced a lot, but for the record, I did not sleep around a lot. Not that there’s anything wrong with doing that, I just didn’t, and feel I should tell you that. Just so we’re clear. I’m professing my innocence here. I was a good girl. No, really, I was. So much so that sometimes I wonder if I shouldn’t have been a little wilder while I could have been. Ah well, hindsight and all that.

Anyway, as I traipse down memory lane, I know there are stories I really should tell you all about, because they’re too good to keep to myself. Those of you who enjoyed the “text-flirting with Lawboy” fiasco…well, then you’ll love some of my other stories. And really, why do I blog if not to amuse you?

But really, this is just something that for some reason, I feel I need to document. My loves, my losses. I sort of wish I’d been blogging all along, I’d love to be able to look back and see how I really felt during these times. I have some journal entries, and I have poetry, which awakens some of those feelings, but mostly, I have memories. I feel I’ve had some great love affairs. The kind they write about and turn into movies. Obviously, as I’m single, they weren’t movies with necessarily happy endings, but neither was the greatest love story of all time…Romeo and Juliet didn’t ride off into the sunset did they? I’m not claiming to have “the greatest love story of all time” here, but I’ve had some doozies.

Sometimes, when I think of the relationships I’ve had, and discuss with friends the ones they have, or have not had, I wonder if I’ve filled my quota? Have I met all of my great loves already? They say everyone has a soulmate, but I honestly believe I’ve already met mine, and it didn’t work out, so is that it for me? Did I love too much too soon, and use up all the resources set out for me? Or is there more? Most women I know have only had one great love. Did I get more than my share, and am I therefore no longer allowed any more? I’d like to think not. I’d like to think that there is one more, to top all others, out there for me. The one that will make me question all the rest. On that, only time will tell. But of my past loves? I have only fond memories, learned lessons, and bittersweet smiles reserved for them.

And I have blogging. So stay tuned, I’ll be sharing some of those stories in the coming weeks.
In the meantime, I leave you with the lyrics below. Replace the genders where appropriate, and the song couldn’t be more fitting.

To All the Girls I've Loved Before
by Julio Iglesias and Willie Nelson



To all the girls I've loved before
Who traveled in and out my door
I'm glad they came along
I dedicate this song
To all the girls I've loved before

To all the girls I once caressed
And may I say I've held the best
For helping me to grow
I owe a lot I know
To all the girls I've loved before

The winds of change are always blowing
And every time I try to stay
The winds of change continue blowing
And they just carry me away

To all the girls who shared my life
Who now are someone else's wives
I'm glad they came along
I dedicate this song
To all the girls I've loved before

To all the girls who cared for me
Who filled my nights with ecstasy
They live within my heart
I'll always be a part
Of all the girls I've loved before