So, it’s here, the flowers and candy and hearts and pink balloons, and jewelry and Hallmark cards holiday (if we can truly call it that). That one day a year when love is in the air and all is cheerful and romantic. WHATEVER…
It is without a doubt the one calendar day when the masses divide, into the haves and have-nots, the lovers and the lonely. And therefore, as a representative of the single class, it is expected of me to have something to say. In fact, it was requested of me by my cousin that I post one of my blog entries, with my witty (my word, not hers) and sarcastic sense of humor. So, Moni, this is for you.
Here’s the thing though, I’m not feeling Valentine’s day this year, one way or the other. I’ve had plenty of Vdays when I was both single and “entangled”, and on these days, I’ve had both negative and positive reactions. There have been the “he’d better remember, I’d better get flowers” days, and the “oh, he’s so sweet, I can’t believe he showed up with flowers and candy” moments. There have also been the “I’m such a loser I don’t have a date” days, and the “whatever, I’m just going to spend it with my also single friends and mock the whole thing as being a corporate holiday meant for spending money and driving people crazy” rants.
But this year? I almost forgot it was coming. Then last week I decided to buy some Valentines to send out to all my friends. But, in typical procrastinator fashion, I still have them sitting on my desk at home…maybe I’ll send them out next year (sorry girls, it's the thought that counts right? Imagine getting a Hello Kitty Valentine in the mail...it's from me, it says "Be Mine" or some other corny thing). But the key is this, I’ve barely noticed the hearts and ribbons and pink and ads for flowers and Kay Jewelers. It’s just not been on my priority list of things to obsess about. The main reason being that I have truly made peace with being single, to the extent that I’m comfortable, satisfied and even happy with my status.
So, for those of you who were anxiously expecting the inevitable sarcastic rant, I must apologize for this year, I just don’t have it in me. I’m not getting soft, and I’m not “giving in”, I’m just not interested enough. As far as I see it, it is Tuesday, I have some sort of ear infection (great fun), and I’m hoping the ringing in my head subsides enough to make it to the gym tonight. I don’t want to go home and sulk, because I’m not in a sulking mood. I don’t want to find a way to celebrate it with other singles, or to “treat myself extra special” because it’s Tuesday, what’s so special about it? But I’m also not anti-Valentine this year. I hope those of you who find yourselves in relationships get lots of flowers, candy, and romance. I know if I was in your situation, I’d want it too, all “snarky remarks” about commercial holidays aside.
So, in honor of the holiday that I almost forgot existed, I’ve decided to share some Valentine’s Day memories with you.
The first took place in 1992 or so; I was in high school and working at McFast food restaurant. There was a boy, we’ll call him “O”, and he asked me out for V-day. I don’t remember too much about the actual date, besides these two things: He gave me a pink stuffed monkey, (and possibly a flower, but I don’t recall) and his car smelled like gasoline, therefore the pink stuffed monkey smelled like gasoline for months to come. I’m pretty sure we had a nice time, but I also know we never went out again, though we continued to work together and get along just fine. I still have the pink monkey, he is now part of a collection of stuffed monkeys I’ve acquired as gifts over the years, in fact, I went on to receive at least one other stuffed monkey at a later Valentine’s day. Still trying to figure out the monkey thing…wonder if they’re trying to tell me something?
Next memory takes place possibly 5 years ago, it was my second time with my most recent ex, who had also been my first real love, we had a 3 year break between our two times together. I remember that he didn’t call me that day until much later than is acceptable for Valentine’s day. I also remembered that he was one of those “Valentine’s day is commercial, I love you every day why do I have to make a big deal out of today” kind of guys, so therefore, I spent most of the day mad at him. Typical in our relationship. So, after a day of no flowers at the office, and barely a “Happy V-Day” on the phone, I came home cranky and frustrated to find a box of chocolates and flowers on my bed. The jerk had stopped by my house on his way home from work and dropped them off. I’ve never forgotten how this was the perfect example of how this holiday can be so manipulative. I’d been angry all day, and he turned out to do something completely out of character and sweet, romantic and unexpected. And then of course when I called to tell him I loved it, he blew it off with his typical “yeah, whatever, I only did it because you didn’t think I would”. Sigh…EX-boyfriend for a reason.(or 10)
The final memory I will share with you is my favorite "dear to my heart" Valentine’s Day memory. I was in college. Valentine’s day was on a Monday. On Friday a group of girls was bemoaning their lack of boyfriends, and therefore the impending misery of the coming Monday. With us were some guys as well, among them, hmmm I’ll call him “G”. We were informing G, in that teasing way girls do, that we were expecting flowers and candy from him on Monday. We were also quickly informed that we were dreaming, and would receive no such thing. Fast forward to Monday, VDAY. Sitting in class, and G isn’t even there. I should add quickly that G and I had had some flirtation with each other prior to this, but nothing too definitive. So, suddenly the door to the class opens, and in comes G, a little late, possibly out of breath from climbing the 20 flights of steps (hey, my memory is a little failed here, so I’ll make things up if I want) and plops himself down on his desk next to mine. He is carrying flowers, roses if I remember correctly (I really need to do some memory exercises). Obviously I assumed someone had given them to him, and truth be told, was probably a bit disappointed. That is until he plops them on my desk, and proceeds to dig out a box of chocolates (big red heart shaped kind) and plop that on my desk as well. HOW TOTALLY CUTE is that? That began a fun, and strange on-again, off-again thing with G and I that lasted for years. He left at some point during school to join the army, and we had one of those “relationship by correspondence” things where we weren’t really together, but every time he’d be home on leave, we’d re-connect like we were together. Last I heard he'd gotten married, but never told me directly about it. We lost touch, we moved on, I wish him all the best, and hope he knows what a special place in my heart he’s got. We were never very serious, but he’s always been one that defines romance for me.
Well, hell, maybe I am getting soft. Must be the ringing in my head. I’m going out to buy a stuffed animal, preferably a monkey, to give to Lil K (the little sister) on my way home. And if you do want some Anti-Valentine’s sentiments, go here: http://www.meish.org/vd/ (where the above picture was stolen from). I was directed there by another blogger, and it’s funny as hell, so I had to share.
Happy Valentine’s Day everyone!